having sadie, 6, and georgia, 3, in my house this week has been a learning lesson.  their parents do an awesome job and i’m taking notes as best i can.  the most shocking revelations thus far center in on how incredibly early children wake up.  at 6 this morning, georgia was just sitting in the dead middle of her bed waiting for someone else to wake up.  also - dora the explorer is the absolute worse thing in the world.

“lisa turn the wheel…turn the wheel lisa.”  i would actually prefer the new moon lady porn over dora the explorer.

oh great, lisa’s turning the wheel…again.  oh and yes, as a bonus, in 24 more minutes there’s ANOTHER episode of dora on!

i am now the butt of 90% of my jokes.  i have signed up for and PAID to run a race.  it’s a 5k race.  the k’s stand for:

kunbearable
kmiserable
kpainful
khorrible
kstupid

it’s in draper so it officially combines all of my least favorite things.  the only thing worse would be if new moon is playing on a big screen whilst running.

i’ve ran 100 miles now in my attempt to train to run a half-marathon.  feels like an accomplishment since i hate running and am so, so bad at it.  5k for thanksgiving i think - take myself out for a test drive.

intelligent women everywhere are preparing to dumb themselves down tomorrow for part two of the twilight movies (or lady porn as i call it).  whilst i don’t judge them, i am all too happy to mock and tease them since the large majority of the female twilight fans i know are educated, strong, independent and smart.

here’s an incomplete list of things i’d rather do than watch new moon tomorrow:

- clean bathrooms at a golden corral.
- run a half marathon (which is going well - up to 4 miles a day now).
- listen to tyra banks talk about herself.  actually no.  never mind.
- be a substitute teacher that has to teach sex education for the day to 8th graders.
- fly coach to new york with layovers in denver, dfw, kansas city, minneapolis, atlanta and dulles.
- be a ranch hand for a day.
- homework.
- read hardy boys mystery novels out loud at the mall to whomever would take pause to listen to america’s favorite problem solving brothers read in my awkward david sedaris reading voice.
- something involving country music, but i’m not sure.  eat dinner at toby keith’s i love this bar and grill in “downtown” oklahoma city.

in the end though ladies i can’t hate.  have you seen me geek up on soccer?  i’ll take my real salt lake cup game on sunday any day over your lady porn.  let’s just agree that everyone is different and your taste in books that are made into movies is bad.